and we have picked a donor!

5 04 2011

As of today, we have chosen a donor. It was such a weird experience, but I wanted to explain it on this blog, to hopefully help someone else going through this process.

This has to have been the weirdest ‘shopping experience’ of my life. We started with a list of the major sperm banks that my RE uses(Xy.tex, cali.fornia cry.obank, fair.fax cry.obank), and looked at prices per vial, minimum orders, donor screening policies, donor information availability, shipping prices, policies on storage, etc. and chose the one that was cheapest based on our criteria and most convenient as well.

We knew we wanted a donor that A- resembled Mr. X as much as possible B- had the same blood type as X or as me C- had known pregnancies from previous donations and D- had a large quantity of vials available. A, B, and C were all available on the donor profile, and D we had to contact the company for, as it varied by donor and by type of vial(ICI, IUI, ART and prewashed vs unwashed).

We started with A and searched based on those criteria. We got a list of approximately 35 donors that met that criteria. Then we added B into the mix, and narrowed that list by half(it helps that we have two of the most common blood types in the US). Then we added C, and eliminated several more.

This is when we started to really search. We opened all the profiles up into their own browser windows, and started to look in depth at the profiles. We started eliminating people based on age (no one older than Mr. X, no one younger than X by more than 7 years), then by height & weight(looking for a donor as close to his build as possible again). We got our list down to less than 10 donors and finally printed the profiles. Each of us narrowed it down to 5 possible donors, and then we compared our lists. 3 donors on our lists overlapped, and those became our top 3.

In the end, we narrowed it down to 2 donors, and called the company to check on our final criteria(D). Based on the information they gave us, we chose our final donor and feel good about the donor we have chosen. The donor has a high number of known pregnancies from previous donations, but is not close to being removed from the donor list(after a certain number of known pregnancies, donors are removed from the list and are only available after that to people who have previously used that donor to conceive a child). He is very close to Mr. X in height and weight(is only an inch taller and in the same weight range). He also matches me in blood type and X in looks. Reading about his extended family in the profile, he seems like a great guy with great genetics, so we are very positive about this donor.

Now comes the fun…paying the bill for the sperm and waiting for the IUI. Hurry up AF, I’m ready to cycle again!




2 responses

6 04 2011
Finding My New Normal

How exciting. We are a couple of months away from choosing our egg donor so it’s nice to see how you guys came to this decision. Good luck!

16 04 2011

I wish I could have read your post back before we went thru this, I was so worried about it all. It ended up being fine, accepting that we would never find an option that we ‘wanted’, and that we would just have to set aside ourselves in making the choice. We ended up having to go thru the selection process three different times, because we only ever bought enough for the cycle before us, and each donor ended up selling out!

Wishing you lots of luck moving forward!

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